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Slippers

It is a frosty October morning. A new moon hangs in the pale sky. And I slide my feet into your old slippers. The thought occurs that I don't need to apologize for borrowing them anymore. You used to ask me not to take them. They were broken in just right for you. I had my own slippers. But after you died, I threw my own away. I didn't need them. I had yours. My feet needed to fit in the imprints you left. So I take a deep breath and open the door, And though my breath rises like a ghost into the cold air My feet and heart are warm as I whisper, "thank you."

Pregnancy Loss and a gracious God

He makes the barren woman to keep house and to be a joyful mother of children. Psalm 113:9 A week ago, this verse would have made me angry. But as I slowly begin to heal after a miscarriage, I am finding comfort in that precious verse. This was my third pregnancy loss. Twice within our first year of marriage, my husband and I experienced this sorrow. It was heartbreaking. But we recovered as best we could. Finally, after almost a year of trying, I conceived again. We were so thrilled. We got in to see the OB doctor very early and I was closely monitored. All seemed fine. We got to see our little bean’s heart beating fast at just 5 and a half weeks on Dec. 22. (That was a joy we had not experienced with our other pregnancies which both ended before a heartbeat was detected.) Though I struggled with nausea and fatigue, I rejoiced at these symptoms of what I hoped was a healthy pregnancy. On January 12, I had another ultrasound. I was about 8 and a half weeks along. The technic

One year ago..

As I type these words, it is March 17th. St Patrick's Day. Tomorrow, March 18th, is a milestone that I have been dreading. One year ago tomorrow, my beloved husband breathed his last here on earth and woke up in Heaven. I have decided to blog about my journey of grief that began that morning. I pray it is both a step of healing for my own heart and also that it brings glory to my God who has brought me through and continues to walk with me. When I woke up and discovered Matt still and lifeless beside me, James woke up at almost the same time and I heard him coming to our room. Frantically, I tried to shield him from what was happening, but he did see his Daddy. Words came out of me as I tried to comfort my four-year-old son. I remember telling him, I think Daddy has gone to Heaven. James started crying and I told him, I think God decided it was time for him to come home to Heaven. The words seemed to comfort James in some small way. One of Matt's friends and coworkers show

Little Moments-Big Dreams

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